Our gorgeous little boy

We had our 20 week scan this afternoon and it was absolutely amazing!! We could see baby's stomach, kidney's, heart, brain etc etc. Baby had his hands behind his head the whole time totally chilled out and gave me a good kick here and there. He was not very cooperative for the poor sonographer and was on the move most of the time. We are so relieved that everything seems absolutely perfect and are already so in love with our gorgeous little boy.

We have still not mastered the art of uploading decent scan images, but are heading down to Cornwall tomorrow where we will hopefully get some technical assistance, but in the meantime here are some poorer quality pics.

Hope everyone has an awesome Christmas :-)

Baby flutters

The last 4 weeks since the scan have absolutely flown by and baby Pilkington is growing well!! I am still waiting for that blossoming phase to start and to finally get some energy back and have been feeling more nauseous than ever recently. I have also started to feel baby moving in the last few days - just tiny little flutters but really really exciting. G and I hired a doppler a few weeks ago and we just absolutely love listening to baby's little heartbeat. Here is (a badly taken) pic of baby bump's progress:

We are really looking forward to our next scan on the 23rd December and are excited at the possibility of finding out whether this baby is a boy or girl. The other exciting news is that we recently took delivery of a very special gift, thank you very much to some special people we love it love it love it! Unfortunately little Zee also loves it and would love nothing more than to make that her new home :-)

12 week scan

This morning we went for our 12 week scan - little baby was just too cute and even had it's legs crossed. Baby Pilkington is now 6.5cm big and we have a new due date of 8th May 2008. Our next scan is on the 23rd December.

11 week midwife appointment

Today we had our 11 week midwife appointment - it was at the antenatal clinic at the hospital and boy was it a looong appt. They did all the usual checks with bp etc etc and took what felt like a huge amount of blood for testing !! We are now booked in for our 16 week appointment and also some antenatal classes in March next year. Bring on our 12 week scan next week :-)

9 weeks 5 days

Our little blob has now become a spudlet - little stumps for arms and legs and moving around like mad! Heartbeat was beating strongly, and I could also see it's little umbilical cord - too cute!!

We have a heartbeat!!!

This morning we went to the Early Pregnancy Assessment Unit for a reassurance scan and are absolutely thrilled to say that we could see baby's heart beat! The sonographer let us listen to it for a few seconds and it was just magical. Little baby measures about 8 weeks big, so perfect size for our dates as I am 7 weeks and 5 days pregnant today. Baby is also in the right spot so definitely no ectopic pregnancy. I am so incredibly relieved and thrilled!!

Above is a pic of little baby - not much to see really other than a blob!

7 weeks pregnant

On Saturday we were 7 weeks pregnant - feels really great to be more than half way to that magic 12 week mark. I spoke to the early pregnancy assessment unit today and they have said that I can come in for an early scan later this week - unfortunately they can't offer me an appointment and so it just means a morning of waiting around but well worth it if we get to see bubs! I've also been sent the dates of my first appointments - 20th October for my first midwife appointment where they will do zillions of blood screening tests and then 28th October for my 12 week scan. Receiving those letters was just so great and really did make it feel so real. I haven't been feeling too bad - lots of peeing, sore boobs, tiredness - just the usual pregnancy symptoms! I have been feeling faintly nauseous but not bad at all - am trying to be positive and think I am just one of the lucky ones rather than that something is wrong. Will hopefully be posting with good news on Friday once we've had the scan.

First doctor's appointment

Today we had a doctors appointment to confirm the pregnancy. The appointments were running 30 minutes behind schedule and so my appointment was completely rushed. The doctor filled out my materntiy exemption form (giving me free prescription and free dentists for the next two years) and my antenatal form which will be sent off to my local hospital and I will be contacted for my first antenatal appointment, probably when I am about 10 weeks pregnant. He also confirmed my due date as the 9th May, and then gave me the usual advice: No smoking, no alcohol, no drugs (!), take folic acid etc etc. I am meant to be going on a business trip to Germany in October for 4 days, I will be approx 9 weeks pregnant, I asked him whether he thinks I should go and he just said that there is no evidence that flying causes miscarriage and I could miscarry there or I could miscarry at home. Such awesome advice!! Happy happy days if the doctor says I'm pregnant, it really must be true!!!

4 weeks today!!

After the positive test on Wednesday, we did another one on Friday and then another one this morning. The test line is much stronger and darker than the control line so it looks like the pregnancy hormone is definitely increasing. We are both just so incredibly excited!!! The picture is really blurry but the line on the far right is the test line. Please be a sticky little baby!!

Can't believe it!!!

This morning I woke up at my usual time of 4:45am, and decided to do a pregnancy test .... I was shouting at myself even whilst peeing on the stick thinking I was just being stupid testing so early and setting myself up for disappointment. I really was annoyed with myself! I forced myself not to even look at the test, and put it down on the counter next to the shower and jumped in the shower. But I just couldn't help myself, and immediately turned around to sneak a peak..... I couldn't believe my eyes, but there were two lines, and the second line was actually very strong after only 30 seconds! I AM PREGNANT!!!!!! I felt like an absolute loony standing in the shower laughing and crying. I ended up waking Greig at 6am to tell him the awesome news, but funnily enough somehow we had both just known for a few days anyway. I don't want to get too excited though, after all I still have 4 days to go till my period is even due. Will do another test on Saturday when AF is due, all my fingers and toes are crossed.......

The Two week wait.... (TWW)

So I am now on my second TWW since the miscarriage..... yesterday Greig said to me that he had a feeling that I was pregnant, odly enough I had been thinking the same thing but was too frightened to say it out loud and be disappointed. However I have no symptoms whatsoever to suggest that I could possible be, so am trying not to get my hopes up. Only 4 days to go till Aunt Flow's scheduled visit..... fingers crossed she decides to skip my house from now on!!

Getting there

We are both doing much better now as time goes on, although in the back of my mind I still can't stop counting the weeks.... I keep remembering that I would have been 12 weeks this week. I am still not really sleeping for some strange reason, I wake up at least 5 or 6 times a night. We are off to Belgium this weekend for a friends wedding which I am so excited for, and then off to Spain for a week of sunshine...... I am so looking forward to our holiday and to some serious r&r. I'm sure we will come back refreshed and energised and ready to face the world again :-)

Healing

So it has now been just over 4 weeks since we lost the baby. My first period came bang on 28 days after the miscarriage on Saturday 5th July (Happy birthday to me huh!!) so my body is definitely going back to normal. As to my heart.... it is slowly healing but boy does it still hurt. I feel quite frustrated as I feel I should be "better" by now but my emotions are still all over the place and it's a good day if I don't cry. I do feel like people expect me to be over it by now and I really wish it was as simple as that.

Heartbroken.....

Sadly I had a miscarriage over the weekend which was then confirmed on Monday morning with an ultra sound. We are absolutely heartbroken..... We know all the possible medical reasons of why our little one didn't hang around and are slightly fed up with people telling us that it just wasn't meant to be and that we can always try again. We so wanted THIS baby and no matter how much we know all the medical facts, it doesn't change the fact that it really really really hurts......

It must be true.............

So despite saying I would only test again on Thursday, I woke up at 4am this morning with a very strong urge to pee on yet another stick. This time the line was definitely darker and clearer. It must be true that I'm pregnant....... wooohooooo!!!!

Exciting times!!

Whilst Greig was out playing like Tiger Woods on Saturday, something urged me to do a pregnancy test. It was our second month of "trying" and I was convinced that despite my period being one day late, that I was definitely not pregnant. On a whim, I did the test anyway and was really shocked when a very faint line appeared! I called Greig immediately and asked him to go to Tesco's on his way home to buy another test. Yesterday morning, I repeated the test and another faint line appeared.... Greig is still not convinced I'm pregnant even though I keep telling him a line is a line...... we've agreed to re-test on Wednesday or Thursday to see if the line gets any stronger. And despite not wanting to get our hopes up, we are both so so exited!! In the meantime, if anyone is looking for me, I'll be in the loo compulsively knicker checking for any signs of my period......